Spa Me the Details! (ugh!)

Photo by Dennis Wong

Even as a self professed tomboy, I have delved into one realm often considered the domain of the girly girl.  Spas.  My husband is an avid golfer, and it is the wise resort owner who clued in that many wives aren't as avid golfers as their hubbys.  Rather than have them nag their husbands out of their $200 round of golf, they ingeniously piggy backed spas on the shoulders of golf courses.  Now adays I actually have taken up golf (more on the "Sweater Set as Athletic Apparel" later).  I still opt out of golfing if the spa is particularly good or the weather suckish.

I have acutally patroned spas in more than one country, and now consider myself a bit of an officinado.  In fact, at times I find myself critiquing spas based on my previous experiences.  I have visited both resort spas and day spas.  Both have their uses, but I get more for my money at the resorts, and relax more as well. Their lounges are bigger and often not co-ed.  They have his/hers hot tubs and such, where as most day spas have limited space and thus limited amenities.  (The massages aren't much cheaper though!)

Many might feel a little intimidated going to a resort spa the first time, especially alone.  I personally relish my alone time, and enjoy not speaking one word for hours at a time.   If you are a paying customer, even if you look like a bag lady, the staff there is hired to kiss your butt and make sure you have a pleasant stay.  Most spas require reservations in advance, particularly if you are going with one or more friends.  In these economic times you can probably get in last minute, and also find superb deals as these higher end luxuries work hard to keep their bookings up. 

Even if you only book one small service, you should have access to the spa amenities for the day.  For the budget concious, you could book a pedicure in the morning, hang out all day in the lounge, by the pool, in the hot tub or steam, and/or work out in the gym.  With this in mind, you should bring a small bag of personal items for the day:  reading material (often magazines there, but I like a good book), work out wear, hair ties (for post massage hair, you will look like crap), hair brush (shampoo, conditioner, soap, razors, and blow driers are all usually provided), swimsuit (in most unisex steams and hot tubs suits are optional, definitely need one for co-ed or for common pool side decency). 

When you check out spas in your area ask around, as word of mouth is one of the best ways to make sure you are spending your money on the best value.  Also check for seasonal deals and packages that get you a bunch of services at deeper discounts.  Most spas offer a wide array of services and some offer their own signature services that you can't find at other facilities.  There are generally a variety of massages  available (hot stone, sports, deep tissue, shiatsu, etc.), pedicures/manicures, hair salons, make up specialists, waxing, etc.  There are wraps (they cover you with some sort of nice sounding goo and wrap you in plastic or warm towels or both).  Body scrubs (they scrub you with some mildly abrasive exfoliating substance in a private room, often a wet room, complete with vichy shower (multiple shower heads on a bar that rinse you off).  You often get a set of disposable panties to preserve some of your modesty, and these service providers are adept at towel management to keep you covered where it counts.)  Personal training.  Fitness classes.  Life coaches.  Facials (mens and women's versions, and yes they do "extractions" which is the removal of black heads etc.  You can opt out of this however, you just have to let your service provider know.  This is generally performed after alot of cleansing, so much of your worst pore blockages are already cleared out.)

I generally get some form of massage, a facial and maybe a pedicure on any given day.  I am not a big fan of wraps or scrubs, I like being petted so these treatments are too brief and isolating for me.  I also prefer therapists who zip their pie holes and let me completely chill.  I am too polite to ask though, so I just act like a snobby bitch instead, and they soon quit with the small talk.  Seriously, I just keep small talk to a minimum and that is completely okay, so let the long silences go. 

You need to show up 15 or so minutes before to "check in" which means giving them your financial information (most spas collect for services at the end of your spa day, when you return to the front desk to check out), getting assigned a locker, and provided with a robe and flip flops.  It is also a good time to find your way around...where is the lounge, where do they come and get you for your appointments, etc. 

When you check in, it is a good idea to see how they handle tipping.  Some spas let you add it at the end of your day, and some automatically add in a 20% tip.  One spa I went to you actually had the service providers give you the bill at the end of your treatment and had you tip in front of the therapist or whomever right there and then.  I actually emailed management about that and suggested they change that policy because not only did it take away from the experience and if the therapist sucked and I didn't want to tip her well, I was in a bit of an awkward situation.  On return trips it was noted the policy had changed.

You will find a front desk area for check in, then be shown to your respective locker room and reminded of your appointment times.  Strip down, yes naked, and put on your robe.  This is the issue with co-ed lounges.  If you are in the buff in your robe in the waiting area with a bunch of guys, you need to make sure your robe is well managed to avoid any unintentional flashing.  If you are partaking of the various spa amenities make sure you are back in the waiting lounge (where the service providers come to and call your name to whisk you away for your service) at least 5 minutes before your appointment.  This always makes me feel like grade school again when teams are being picked, and I honestly hate being the last name called.

During the day there are often free teas and lemon water available.  Some sort of healthy fruit snack is also put out for you to enjoy.  I would recommend eating at the spa cafe in the nicer spas.  This food is often wonderfully healthy and delicious!  It can be a little pricey, but part of the indulgent experience.

At the end of your day you can relax with a long hot shower and take your time getting yourself ready to re-enter the world.  I enjoy this time because it is uninterupted time for blow drying my hair, putting on lotion and all those things I fly through at home.  Return your robe and slippers to the locker room counter or to bins provided and proceed to check out.  A good tip is 15-20%, but if it wasn't great, don't be afraid to tip less or stiff em' (sometimes when I hear the therapist yawning or seemingly wishing she were anywhere but massaging me at the moment, I have trouble coughing up a big tip).  On the other hand I appreciate the physical effort of a 90 minute massage (my preference) and tip very well when it is very good. 

You begin to learn what you like and you should make sure you ask for it.   You should be prepared to drop a minimum of a couple hundred bucks for one or two services plus tips and food.  Spas offer an opportunity to be pampered, to check out of your life for a while and just some "you" time to relax.  Most service providers will ask you when you had your last facial or massage....don't be afraid to say never or a year or whatever.  Just go and enjoy and appreciate that you deserve it!